On Telling the Truth with 5-year-old Braden
Last time, Braden and I discussed Dojo Kun number one. Today, we’ll discuss telling the truth and Dojo Kun number two.
J: Braden, can you say Dojo Kun number two?
B: Keep an honest and sincere way.
J: Can you put that into easier words your little brother might understand?
B: Yes. Tell the truth.
J: How do we do that?
B: Well, if someone asks if you’re scared, or if you like something, just tell it like it is.
J: Okay.
B: And don’t make up lies just to tell stories.
J: I have heard that some people do that because they think people will like them better.
B: Lying won’t really make people like you. If it does, they don’t really like you, they like your stories.
Being Honest at the Dojo
J: Can you think of any ways to use Dojo Kun number two at the dojo?
B: Yes. Remember getting push-ups? Well, when Sensei gives you push-ups, then you don’t get a great job ticket. Sometimes, you don’t even get push-ups, but Sensei says, “no ticket for you today,” like if you mess around in class.
J: Yes…
B: Then sometimes Sensei will forget that by the end of class, or another teacher will hand out tickets and you get a ticket when you weren’t supposed to…
J: Uh oh.
B: You have to give that ticket back, to be honest and responsible.
J: That’s true.
Telling the Truth at Home
J: Who is it important to tell the truth to?
B: Your parents and someone even more important too.
J: Why should you be honest with your parents?
B: They take care of me and they want to trust me.
J: Very good. It’s easy to lose trust if you’re not honest, and it takes a long time to earn their trust back.
B: But it’s never too late for telling the truth.
J: What do you mean?
B: Like if you lied and said the dog ate your homework. You should still tell your parents you lied and tell them the truth. Even if it’s days later.
J: And who is it most important to be honest with?
B: With yourself. You always have to be with yourself, every day. If you tell one lie, then another and another, pretty soon you’ll mix yourself up. You won’t even know who you really are or if you like yourself. Always be honest with your own self.
J: Very wise.
The big “L”: Lying
J: Is there ever a time that it’s okay to lie?
B: Yes, I learned that in karate.
J: You did?
B: It’s life protection arts. So you can lie to protect someone’s life.
J: Oh?
B: Like in the cartoon, the cat is chasing the mouse, and when the mouse gets away the cat asks a bird which way he went. The bird lies by pointing the other way, where the mouse didn’t go. He’s helping protect the mouse from being eaten.
J: Do you have anything else to say about telling the truth?
B: If you are honest, then people will like you for it. If you tell the truth and they don’t like you, then they were not meant to like you, so that’s still better.
J: Thank you Braden.
By Jenifer Tull-Gauger